*Dont you give up!*

*Saturday night advice*

*Torn*

*My blog testifies...*

...that music is POWERFUL.

Through music, a persons ability to express themselves extends to the heavens. Music has changed me, softened me, strengthened me, enlightened me, sustained me, and has been an answer to my prayers a million times. I know I've spoken of this on here before, but God has always been able to reach me through music. Especially on the days where I'm feeling 'unreachable'...he uses music to reach me and speak to my spirit. It has brought peace, joy, encouragement, and understanding. I can't imagine life without it.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes on music;

"After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music."

~Aldous Huxley

"Music is worthless unless it can make a complete stranger break down and cry"

~Imogen Heap

Music is a moral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything.

~Plato

Music can change the world because it can change people.

~Bono

Side Note: I also know how music has power to destroy and can bring about deceit, jealousy, rage, hatred, immorality and much more. It can destroy as much as it can save, but that's a post for another day.

Photo taken in Goblin Valley in August of 2008.

*Tis true!*

*A thousand years*

*Linger Longer*

Preface~

It's 6 am and I had been up all night. I was worn down both body and spirit. I lay in my bed trying to sleep and wondering why on earth Heavenly Father still wanted me here. My hands are tied in every situation that I'm in. I can truly say that I have no control over anything at this point. My life is ALL in HIS hands. I don't know what more I can do or offer to bring about the most important and essential things that are needed for survival. I feel helpless. With these thoughts drowning me, into my mind I envision seeing Scrooge (me) sitting on the swing chair that is on the front porch of my old house in Orem, Utah. (I would often sit there to have some meditating and relaxing time as I looked up at an awe-inspiring view of the Rocky Mountains.) So there I am, rocking in the chair and suddenly an Eagle begins to speak to me. *Puzzled face* I sit up in my bed and all these words are forming and I'm really in no mood to write! But I do so. These are the words that unfolded...these are the words that were heaven sent from an old wise Eagle.

*LINGER LONGER*

Linger longer are the words I hear
as I rock back and forth on the front porch chair.
I see an Eagle fly in the Icy air
He flys with grace and with a little flair.
He soars to the left and makes a sharp turn,
"oh my dear girl...I know you must yearn."

Wait.

Did that bird just speak to me?
I'm now questioning my sanity.
He ceases his flight and drifts ever near
and with the tilt of his head these words he shares,

"There are things you need to hear!"

I fold my hands and lend my ear
I open my heart and sit at the edge of my chair.

"I am an eagle with an eagles eye! I've seen how you've been tried and tried! The crows that often circle your head, their time is up and they'll soon be dead.
The new road that I've seen from above
Is more beautiful and lovely then a morning dove!
Linger longer in this mortal sphere
Your work is simply not finished here.
It's time to breath the freshest air
It's time to heal from satans glare.
Trust an old bird, for I'm the wisest
kind! Don't give me that look, your sanity's fine.
I sail over mountains and glorious lakes! My god given wings are truly great.
I rest on peaks on a sleepy day, I watch over children here and far away. My life is truly a wondrous one, but if I was human it would be more fun.
So linger longer and believe on my word, rise to your feet, do not accept defeat.
Linger longer...
Linger longer...
Linger longer."

Those are the final words I hear
Then off he flew with Rudolph the red nosed reindeer.

*wink*

Written by Kim Curtis (That would be me ;)
December 13th 2011
~Painting by Michael Pape

*Flecks of Gold*

Our small acts of love, compassion, kindness, and service will eventually lead us to something that is so beautiful! The accumulation of GREAT THINGS. It has been difficult for me to be patient as I have spent my 37 years collecting only flecks of gold and often wondering when they would turn into something more solid. Wondering if the seeds I may have planted into the hearts of others would ever grow into fruition. We learn in The Book of Mormon,


“Behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise.

Alma 37:6

Also, Doctrine and Covenants 123:13-17 says,

13 Therefore, that we should waste and wear out our lives in bringing to light all the hidden things of darkness, wherein we know them; and they are truly manifest from heaven—

14 These should then be attended to with great earnestness.

15 Let no man count them as small things; for there is much which lieth in futurity, pertaining to the saints, which depends upon these things.

16 You know, brethren, that a very large ship is benefited very much by a very small helm in the time of a storm, by being kept workways with the wind and the waves.

17 Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.

*The boy on the Moon*

Me and my friends use to have "Vege nights", where we would; grab blankets and pillows, have lot's of treats, turn out the lights, turn on mellow tunes, and talk about life and the Universe. It was AWESOME! Some of the subjects that got brought up were hilarious and others deeply profound. I miss those nights. Sometimes it was at one of our houses and other times it was in a park up the canyon. You should try it sometime...good stuff! :) This is the kind of music we would play...anything that was soothing, mellow, and just kool. Those kinds of songs that could take your mind and heart to another place. Most of the music we chose back then was "new age" stuff.

*Men's hearts are failing them*

I can't say enough how much I needed this earlier this week, but because of pride and pain in my heart, I ignored it. Then, while talking with my little sister, she told me that Henley, age 5 watches these Mormon messages before school each day. She said;

"Tears pour down her face because she feels the spirit so strong." When I heard that, I couldn't stop my own tears. This little precious girl listening to our prophet and apostles and feeling the truth of what is being shared. I realized that I too must listen more, read more, and love and treasure these beautiful words of wisdom. I must not let my own heart fail me. I must try harder to not be afraid and have an eternal perspective. I must have the faith and heart of a little child...to know that I need not fear.
"Men's hearts are failing them because they have forgotten their identity and their purpose."

We love our precious, Henley and her beautiful spirit.

*Sticks & Stones*

"Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words will break our hearts."

This is such a powerful and yet painful photo to look at. I have such a deep love for children. Remembering my own childhood, I know the power of words. There were words that blessed my life and words that broke my soul. They created how I felt about myself and life. Some of them never leave my mind.

Bless your children, don't break them down. They really are our future. As the Savior so beautifully said;

"Behold your little ones"

I believe he was saying, LOOK at these precious souls! It is an honor for you to have them placed in your care.

*Truest of words!*

Some people will never get it...and that makes me sad.

*Wishin' for you*

It's been about 15 years since I first heard this song and I can still feel how I felt at that moment it played. Amazing how music can do that! You don't need a time machine, just your music.

*Where the streets have no name*

*I hear you*

I'm gonna skip my personal experience with this song. I'll just keep it tucked in my heart.

*Go gairid Beidh mé saor in aisce*

*An honor*

Thank you to my little Kaul for asking me to be at his baptism and speak on the Holy Ghost. It was a special day for all of us. I am so very proud of him.

*You didn't have to stoop so low*

Random video, but rad song.

*Choose the sunshine!*

"Look, in my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person is still going to think the sun shines out your ass."

~ Juno (movie)

I chose this photo I took of Jen and Joe because it fits the quote perfect. They each found the one who loves them for who they are. :)

*Dear Nie Nie*

Dear Nie Nie,

I have watched you and your story from afar for the last 3+ years. I don't even know you but I LOVE YOU! You're a hero to me and are a constant reminder that life can still be beautiful even when we're walking through fiery furnace. Literally or figuratively. THANK YOU for choosing to stay on earth!







Side Note: to those who know nothing of Nie Nie, please take the wonderful opportunity of reading her story on her blog below. I wrote of her somewhere on this blog of mine, just not sure where. Almost 600 posts from me! Woot!

http://nieniedialogues.com/

*Smiling*

Kauly-wogs baptism invite. This made me so happy when I got it. I just love him so stinking much!!! When he was about five, he said to his mom, "You know what, mom? I think Aunt Kimmy is sad because I'm not with her. I make her happy!" He was right! That bright smile and pure heart makes me happy! It's also pretty incredible to hear an 8 year old who knows his scriptures more than his aunt does. His favorite present from Christmas was getting his tripple combination! (Bible/Book of Mormon/Doctrine & Covenants. Impressive. It's also amazing to watch his face light up as he talks about how kool it must have been for God to create the earth. I'm in awe of his goodness.

*Found him!*

Yip! He's the ONE!

Your Future Husband from Bradley Jackson on Vimeo.

*I have RAD friends*

Thank you Mr. Bean, for this awesome gift! It seriously made my 11-11-11 eleventy times better. ha! Okay, so it would have been kooler if God had given me a super power, but I'll take Joe Joe's and a vintage typewriter as the next best thing. :D

*Soothing your spirit*

I have loved this song since I was little and with Mark Kozelek singing it, it makes it more of a lullaby than it already was to me. Beautiful and soothing.



Isn't it rich?
Are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clowns.

Isn't it bliss?
Don't you approve?
One who keeps tearing around,
One who can't move.
Where are the clowns?
Send in the clowns.

Just when I'd stopped
Opening doors,
Finally knowing
The one that I wanted was yours,
Making my entrance again
With my usual flair,
Sure of my lines,
No one is there.

Don't you love farce?
My fault, I fear.
I thought that you'd want what I want -
Sorry, my dear.
But where are the clowns?
There ought to be clowns.
Quick, send in the clowns.

What a surprise.
Who could foresee
I'd come to feel about you
What you'd felt about me?
Why only now when i see
That you'd drifted away?
What a surprise.
What a cliché.

Isn't it rich?
Isn't it queer?
Losing my timing this late
In my career?
And where are the clowns?
Quick, send in the clowns.
Don't bother - they're here.

*The truest of friends*

Thank you, Brian. :)

*Kauly-Wogs is getting baptized!*

Where did the last 8 years go? He's my hero and I always fight harder in my own battles for him.

*Reaching the unreachable ...*

*Sweet November- A tradition and a promise*

Sara: What are you doing?
Nelson: Buying redemption.
Sara: Redemption's not for sale today.

I watch this movie every year in November. Skipped it last year, but not this one. I love it. I've learned that beautiful things can change your life in one simple moment...one simple day...or one simple month. They may not have the ending you hope for but your life can never be the same, never.

*When words fail you... your musical fave'z will not*

One of my favorite songs to groove too. Funny how the blue butterfly never ceases to make an appearance. *shocked face*



Random photoz that prove I groove.

*The beauty of an oxymoron*

You only know what I want you to
I know everything you don't want me to
Oh your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine
Oh you think your dreams are the same as mine
Oh I don't love you but I always will
Oh I don't love you but I always will
Oh I don't love you but I always will
I always will

I wish you'd hold me when I turn my back
The less I give the more I get back
Oh your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
I don't have a choice but I still choose you
Oh I don't love you but I always will
I always will...

Repeat a Eleventy billion times + 7.

*Hansard & Vedder

Does it get any better than this? Sweet find! I have always thought the lyrics to this song were perfect.

I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You'll make it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice

You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing it loud

*Robot or Wizard?*

Laughed my head off when I read this! That look on Bleu's face? He was seriously upset, no joke! ahhahahhhha

*Some starz refuse to shine...*

Thanx to Cory Mon for sharing this song.

Ps. Cory Mon is an amazing artist. Go here to check out his work.

http://www.corymon.com/

*The veil worker*

This is me and my friend Rocky Cordray. He has just put together a book of his art, poetry, and essays. It is called, "The veil worker". He is very talented, deeply spiritual, and has a keen sense of knowledge as to the things he believes in. I admire his passion for this topic of his personal beliefs and the rich symbolism that his work portrays. Wishing him success in this new and exciting adventure!
P.s. He is also the best Deejay I've ever heard. *Thumbs up*

http://kck.st/rn1qJF

"A fire still burning"

‎"My name is Brandon Flowers. I'm a father, a husband, and I'm a Mormon."

(As my friend, Jeff, so simply wrote under this video on his Facebook page,

"Well done"...I agree. ;)

Ps. Brandon Flowers is the lead singer of "The Killers" incase you didn't know. :)

*Ravages of spirit...*

Pains of the past are sometimes brutal to let go of. I find myself often being stuck there. I have loved deeply and the deeper you love the harder it is to let go, just as this song says. I know how crucial it is to move forward and I do that with fresh courage and HOPE. Like I wrote last September 2010 "I just can't shake it, but I HAVE to!" It's time... the future holds beautiful things and I will embrace them as they come. Tonight is my last weepy night over current circumstances. I will not be shouting, "Play it again, Sarah!" I will let the Lord help heal me and move me in the direction of my own home...wherever that may be.

*Recent thoughts*

I guarantee that no great man ever became great, unless he had someone that believed in him. Even if that someone was from up above and he felt it in his heart.

"Tell me how would you feel? You'd probably give up too...if nobody believed in you."



A few favorite quotes from my journal reading this weekend.

"Sometimes we are flown into peoples lives when they just need to be cheered up and reasurred. And it turns out that it just happens to be your job, we don't know why...in your case it was my job."

~Sliding Doors

"If mutual affection cannot be...let the more loving one be me."

~Felicity

*Old School*

I loved this. Ha! So true!

My old "boom-box" and mix tapes. AWESOME!

*Nash's wedding...*

...was great! It was as cowboy as cowboy gets! I even put on some shiz-kickerz for the event as well. :)  Beautiful ceremony, beautiful couple, a Yee Haww of a good time reception. (mechanical bull and all!)

*I've always been true to myself and always will be*

I've said it before, but I love that I've kept journals. I'm reading my jr. high ones and laughing my guts out. So embarrassing! The thing I never realized until recently was that I was always a gutsy little sucker! I WAS shy...but I still did things that would embarrass most people to death. Somethings never change. ;) After writing that I wanted to marry River Phoenix...I wrote the lyrics to this song and said, "This song keeps that hope in me." ha!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ps. I almost sent him a Book Of Mormon. For realz. ;) I was a 7th grader!

I say this in all humility. I LOVE ME. I'm so glad I follow my heart...no matter what anyone thinks. I work hard to trust in my feelings and just be myself.

*I am not ashamed of The Gospel of Jesus Christ...*

...The Book Of Mormon is TRUE!

*Ahh snap!*

I can't believe I failed to announce that my nephew Nash, is getting married in 3 days! Oops! He is our cowboy in the family and she is a REAL cowgirl. We are gonna have a whoopin' good time at his reception. Cowboy hats, boots, and the works! Can't wait. I love him tons and also love the girl he is marrying. They are a great match.

Ps. The photo beneath their invitation is me holding him as a baby. I was 16. Weird how fast the years have passed. Don't hate me because I was beautiful. *rolling eyes*

Pss. Not sure who the photographer is but I'll find out to give her/him credit.

*Dub Dub Dubsteppin' ...RAD!*

I know I said no more videos, but I'm totally without a personality right now. Watch this guy Dub it up! I might dance way better than he does but, I would never say that out loud. heh heh

*I'm a Great Aunt!*

On September 21st my niece Tiffany, gave birth to her first baby, a beautiful little girl that they named *Elliana Sage Van Voorhis* She is adorable! 8 pounds! Lot's of dark brown hair and huge bubba lips! So cute! I couldn't stop kissin' those chunker cheeks! :D Tiffany & Josh are so in love with her and are already loving the feeling of being new parents. I'm so happy for them and proud of them! I'm also excited to have this baby be a part of our family.

*Loss of inspiration*

So, I'm in quiet mode right now. My blog is so boring! Who want's to watch all these videos I've posted? I don't! hahahah I'm sorry, I feel a bit blank and uninspired... tongue-tied? Without feeling? A mute?! hahahh

I think this photo say's it all. It's cute and say's it all. I'll try hard to get my spunk back.

*Muse sings "Streets"*

So glad I heard this! No one is allowed to cover U2 in my book. Only a few select songs by select people. I can honestly say that Muse did a brilliant Job! Of course it wouldn't be as good without the key to the song, THE EDGE and his guitar. Well done!

*Ivy & Gold*

So, I went on walk at the Beach in Spain with my Best Friends mini-shuffle.  I had forgot my iPod so I borrowed hers.  I asked Heavenly Father a question (something I often do on walks) and it was interesting because several songs came on that kind of applied quite well, in a strange sort of way, to what I asked.  I didn't know any of the songs and my friends mini-shuffle doesn't show the name of the song or who sings it.  So I wrote some lyrics down later and looked them up on iTunes when I got home.  I found this song to be especially fitting.  It was kind of crazy because a photo of one of the bands albums came up and It was a photo I had seen before. A photo that had puzzled me and I wondered where it came from or what the meaning was behind it.  Well, it came from the cover of an album by the Bombay Bicycle Club. Ha!  One of those Serendipity things I guess ;)  Anyhoo, here's the song.  It has stayed in my head and It makes me happy.  Hope it makes you happy too.

~Ivy and Gold- Bombay Bicycle Club

*Psalms 46*

Perfectly appropriate for today. Thank you, Mr. President.  This is one of my favorite Psalms and one of the most powerful.

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Psalms 46

1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;

3 Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof.

4 There is a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the most High.

5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, just at the break of dawn.

6 The heathen raged, the kingdoms were moved: he uttered his voice, the earth melted.

7 The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.

8 Come, behold the works of the Lord, what desolations he hath made in the earth.

9 He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire.

10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

11 The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.

*Thought for the day*

"It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell."

~Buddha

*Kimmy, I love you*

Probably the most adorable thing I've ever heard! I love you, Henley! Thank you for your love song!

http://khu.sh/usersong_4e6182d3b349e

*Spain Spain I know your name!*

I went, I saw, and I loved it. Spain was great and seeing my British friends who I haven't seen in 10 years was even better. So grateful for the opportunity to go. I'll post pics soon...but until then, here is me with my awesome tan I got! *wink wink*

*Bye Bye Utah*

My bags are packed and I'm ready to go...see ya soon!

*Have a laugh*

I love that my brother in law introduced me to these. So classic! hahhhaha

*I don't know weh*

I'm sorry but I could not stop laughing.

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"I'm leavin' on a jet plane...

...to a little place called SPAIN!" Okay, so yay! I'm going to Denia, Spain in about two weeks with my best friend. We are meeting up with our British friends who we haven't seen in 8 years. They go on "holiday" there almost every year and I've been invited for the last 3 years. FINALLY I'm able to go! Fingers crossed for good health/peace for me and for my family while I'm away. I NEED THIS!

Spain+British Friends+BFF= SO STOKED!

Doesn't look very pretty does it? ;)

*Believer*

Dedicated to my great friends who have stood by me for so damn long through consistent trials. "I get by with a little help from my friends" never truer words were spoken. Thank you.

Ps. Gotta love me some Ben Kweller. :)

*Everlasting Splendors*

“It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you say it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations – these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit – immortal horrors, or everlasting splendors."

~ C.S. Lewis

Photo taken in Lehi, Utah. I'm guessing 2006. I have no concept of time.

*Say Anything*

I KNOW I've done a post on one of the greatest movies ever,'Say Anything'. I would be shocked if I haven't. My love of the movie is based around Lloyd Dobler. The Man of all men. A man who stands outside a girls house with a ghetto blaster over his head to try and win her heart back...or to tell her he's not giving up on her. It also happens to have one of my favorite songs of all time playing during that moment...a moment that went down in movie history. Here's the trailer, the song, the AMAZING lyrics, and my old bathroom that reminded me daily that I'm worth a man standing outside MY DOOR with a ghetto blaster. :D






love I get so lost, sometimes
days pass and this emptiness fills my heart
when I want to run away
I drive off in my car
but whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are

all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light
the heat I see in your eyes

love, I don't like to see so much pain
so much wasted and this moment keeps slipping away
I get so tired of working so hard for our survival
I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive

and all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

in your eyes
the light the heat
in your eyes
I am complete
in your eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
in your eyes
the resolution of all the fruitless searches
in your eyes
I see the light and the heat
in your eyes
oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light,
the heat I see in your eyes
in your eyes in your eyes

*Let go*